Day 19 Level 2 (Day 4 on Level 2)
Eh - I don't have anything new to add. Sucks, shoulders hurt, yada, yada, yada.
Food

Roots part deux
I was thinking more about the roots post I did the other day. I think the thing that I find the most remarkable is how much it all skewed my sense of self. My memory is of being a fat kid. People who loved me told me I was fat so I must have been, right? But I see photos of myself and I wasn't fat. I wasn't even particularly chubby. I was a little soft and rounded but aren't 8 and 9 year olds supposed to have some baby fat? I see a normal kid as I search for evidence of the fat kid that lives in my memory. I don't start seeing something more than normal until I hit puberty - around 13 or 14 I probably carried 5-10 lbs more than I needed. It wasn't until I was 17 that I can start to see something worth my family's comment. By then, in my mind, I had been fat for a decade and I gave up.
I was fat through college. Pizza! Beer! And access to all of the foods that had been denied me for years. About 2 years after college, I got tired of being fat and joined a gym. I worked out regularly and hard. I went to the gym for 2 hrs at least 4 times a week. I lost some weight but still didn't look as good as I should have for the exercise I was getting. Unfortunately this was the early/mid 90's and fat free was king. I was eating rice, bread, pretzels, and pasta to my hearts content because it was Fat! Free! It was practically health food as long as I didn't use butter. I ate almost no protein because animals contained fat. I ate carbs almost exclusively thinking I was eating healthy. I went back to fat for awhile and then got finally got healthy and hit a weight I was happy with. Then pregnancy and a year after giving birth here I am.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Speak.